Jelly jelly bo belly

I just had a flashback to 1984. I had to have these shoes. I bugged and bugged and then when we made a winter visit to Florida I managed to pick up a clear pair of these shoes at Target.

Biggest mistake I ever made in the fashion world of the 80s.

Worse then my dusty pink leg warmers, worse then my lace ode to Madonna material girl gloves, worse then lumber jackets in red plaid.

I worse these babies out of the store and was thrilled with finally owning a pair. I'd be the first in my group who all covetted the shoes that were jelly.

Within an hour my feet hurt. It was 80 degrees and humid. My feet swelled and all the little plastic lines on those shoes molded my feet into an interesting looking sculpture. Kinda like your face looks like after a night on a punched up pillow.
They also didn't breath so my feet on the inside were getting slimy and hot. When I finally took my shoes off gladly after a 2 hour walk back along the beach walkway to our hotel room my feet reeked. It was the nastiest smell that has ever come off my body - worse than fart.

It was bad. Of course, I couldn't let my parents know how much I now hated these shoes. I didn't want to get a told you so and if I coveted another item at a later time it would be game over in the "please, please, please I'll just die" round of getting what I THOUGHT I wanted.

Also please note the heels on these shoes.

I had to buy $500 orthodic inserts a few years ago because of a heel spur... I now believe these heels were the direct culprit to later years of pain. Walking should never be taken for granted but when you are a frivolous teenager footwear is about being cute - not smart.

If you see heels like these on any pair of shoes - DO NOT BUY.

So dear readers if you have never had the pleasure of wearing jelly shoes - trust me - you dont' want to go there. Not just for the pain ... the smell.