Bush Pig

So here's the scene this morning. Its crisp yet beautiful this morning. The snow had finally stopped falling, the roads were clear, there was a hint that there might even be some sun later in the day. My husband and I leave the house this morning like every other week day morning. Rushed, forgetting something but once we're on our way the going is good. We were almost out of our little Burb and entering the city when the most jaw dropping image passes me by. Its not very often I do double takes but that is exactly what I did this morning.

I tried to get my husband to catch back up to this vehicle in the other lane but as always when I see something, or someone he goes into slowdown mode. This usually applies to me wanting to wave like a loonie to someone driving by or stopping to check out something interesting put out to the curb* Needless to say I didn't get the picture to share here this evening.

Allow me to describe this for you without pictorial proof.

• Black Chev truck, older model, oversize tires, jacked up a little more than necessary but by no means a monster.

• Paint job actually looks like it had been painted black with a roller and then sprayed with a clear gloss paint.

• The windows are tinted illegal black at the sides and back

• There is a huge over sized white Chev logo on the back window.

• There is a mural.

Sure you see murals all the time you think, big deal. Okay picture this:

The truck drives by and I get a nice eyeful on the tail gate.

• First I see BUSH PIG........ this would be on the far right of the tail gate.
• Then my eyes are drawn to the centre of the tail gate.
• A blonde woman with long locks, big red lips and two big blue stars for nipple covers.

It was huge. I was not prepared for this image on the day predicted by economists to be the biggest shopping day of the Christmas season.
My head was actually reeling with the thought process that must have gone into this truck. I was half expecting to see names on the sides of the truck for 'his' and 'hers'.

The mural was surely unique. "Bush Pig" was painted like an after thought in rough brush strokes - yep brush strokes. The female with boob weaponry was painted with acrylics or something along those lines.

It was definitely 'folk' art.

I decided maybe there is more to the story of Bush Pig. I thought it was a little pig in South America but how wrong I was. It amazing what leads you to learn new things these days.

Of course I used my favorite search engine - Google to look up just what a Bush Pig is in todays lingo.

1. It is a little pig from parts of the Continent of Africa.

2. Near the top of the google search is the urban dictionary.

There were a few descriptions "extremely ugly, bitch with a face like a smashed crab" It goes one but I'll let those interested further their education by following the link. Its not flattering. I don't think the Muralist was going for that. In the Urban dictionary there are several derogatory terms for bush pig but there is also ONE definition of a really hot chick. This must be the thought process of the truck owner..... I just don't know.

3. Also in Google ANVIL has a song entitled Bush Pig. I've heard of Anvil but I'm not familiar with the lyrics. The lyrics have been removed for copyright reasons but I am pretty sure that it wasn't going to paint a woman in a very flattering image.

4. There is a group of Jeep, mud boggers in Central Ontario called Bush Pigs. They have 4x4's and get dirty. That actually looked like fun but these vehicles were all Jeep products so unless the Chev is having an identity crisis or wants to be part of the cool Bush Pig gang I don't think that this is what they were going for.

5. Some kind of fishing bait

6. A cross between a dirt bike and a skate board - actually looks kinda fun.

I assure you if I ever see this truck again I will snap a picture and if given the opportunity I will ask "why.... the mural" It could be a real Barbara Walters moment. Who knows.

I was thinking about the reactions of this persons friends when 'Carl' pulls up in his new truck.

Gee Carl, I'm sure glad you bought a truck. I was wondering how I was going to pick up some cords of wood at my in laws. Check out the back, why? On second thought I'll rent a truck Carl. I'd hate to scratch up that truck.

Teenage girl. Dad! "Do you really have to drop me off in front of the school!? I promise on my favorite pair of shoes, I will clean my room when I get home and clean the house,... and mow the lawn. Just please drop me a block away. I'll never be late again and ask you to drive me to school."

I could be assuming all wrong.

BUSH PIG might not be owned by a man at all.

I pray that this is the counter revolution to the Cougars..

Cougars - successful, sexy women over 40. Independent and really enjoys younger men's company.

Bush Pig - I work at McDonalds. I've got most of my teeth and I'll flash my tits at you in the drive-thru if you honk three times.

• Shudder.

*There is no shame in that.